Carnivore

So, I have safely arrived in Nairobbery. The city is pretty large with not a whole lot to see. People call it Nairobbery for a multitude of reasons:

1. It's very violent. You can't really go out at night. At all.
2. You pay a massive tourist tax. Everything is hugely expensive. It feels like robbery without the excitement.

Anyway, it was nice to be in a real city again. The people seem reasonably friendly. I didn't venture far from the campsite because I was exhausted from the previous week's events. I went to supermarket nearby to purchase some dairy products. I have been missing dairy a lot recently. There is really no milk to speak of farther north than Nairobi, and what is there is not pasturized. So, my meals consisted of yogurt, ice cream and coffee with a lot of milk. In fact, I ate 1L of chocolate yogurt with chocolate frosted flakes in it for lunch and a snack. I had a real craving. However, I have a main point of this post: Carnivore.

So, Carnivore restaurant. My dream come true. I was ready to stop the tour and just live at this place. It's heaven. It is a restaurant with a flat fee for dinner (about $30USD), and worth every penny. It's all-you-can-eat meat. And all sorts of different kinds of meat. A lot of people went to this place that night. I would guess 20 of us. I just don't think the staff knew what was coming. We had all just come off a 7 day stretch of riding in some hard dirt and were looking forward to a huge meal and some beers. I bet I turned them non-profit for the night. I ate more than 2kg of meat, and probably closer to 3kg. Easily. I ate all different kinds of meat that night. The list is as follows:

1. Ox testicle (very good, actually)
2. Ostrich meatballs
3. Camel steak
4. Lamb roast
5. Turkey
6. Chicken breast
7. Chicken liver
8. Beef steak
9. Pork spare ribs
10. Pork sausages
11. Crocodile
12. Lamb sausages

It was awesome. The waiters just come around with huge skewers of different meats and ask you if you want some. Of course I did. You know what's a bad idea on their part? Letting me loose into an all-you-can-eat spot after a week of riding and no real steak to speak of for two months. So, I did what any red-blooded bodybuilder would do. I got into an eating competition with somebody else (come on, what did you expect?) Myself and a guy named Scott ate ourselves stupid. The staff actually made an attempt at cutting us off the meat, which we would have none of. We did end up stopping the eating after almost 3 hours because the other 18 people were waiting to order desert. However, you guys will be proud, I maintain my "I can eat the most of anyone on the tour" status. If the Danimal was born with tear ducts, I would have cried tears of joy. When people speak of disaster as "a bull in a china shop", they have clearly not seen a Danimal in a buffet. I'm pretty sure kids were crying at the devastation I left behind. And I take pride in helping do some animal control in this country.

On a different note, my brakes arrived in Nairobi. I have to give a huge shout-out to Bushtukah for getting me these parts. The brakes are Avid BB5 mechanical disc brakes, which is an upgrade from my previous set-up. They came with rotors, calipers, pads, mounting brackets, and even spare pads! I can not thank these guys enough for the parts sent over seas. It would be hard to finish a tour with no brakes, although sometimes I'm not going fast enough to need them. However, thanks again Bushtukah for hooking me up with these parts.

So, I keep promising pictures, which will most certainly be delivered, just not right now. I will post again later today, but I just wanted to write about Carnivore. To be honest, that's as far as my trip planning went and now I'm lost. However, apparently there are more animals to eat the farther south I go, so I will keep you all updated. Until then, here are some random stats.

Total distance: 5210km (5530 for the tour, due to my sick day and robbery convoy)
Total punctures: 16
Top speed to date: 76km/h
Types of animal eaten on tour: 10 (I had pigeon in Egypt)
Hours in the saddle: 240

Until next time,
Danimal